Monday, May 28, 2007

next year, i will wear a sparkly dress

It was my friend Buster’s birthday party last night. I admire his dedication to having the party on his actual birthday. Even if it’s a Sunday. Like last night. A Sunday night birthday party is usually just dinner somewhere, a few presents and if you’re at a Mexican restaurant, some complimentary flan. But Buster goes all out. It’s really commendable.

Buster is the only other person I’ve ever met who names their birthday years. I name my birthday years. This is year three of me naming my birthday year. I look at the name as more of a theme, he refers to it as his “birthday wish” and believes that birthday wishes have special powers. This sounds silly when I type it but if you’re ever in a conversation with him about birthday wishes and he tells you this theory, you just believe it. He has conviction.

I’ve only known Buster for two birthdays. Below is a chart:

Buster’s Birthday Wishes / Heather’s Birthday Year Themes
2005 : unknown / Year of Debauchery
2006 : Higher Highs, Lower Lows / Year of Conscious Choices
2007: Double Down / Year of Actualization

As you can see, his are more abstract. Mine are like fortune cookies. We both agree however - your wish/theme will make itself known. In other words, if you are considering naming your birthday year - be careful. It comes true. If you remember nothing else from this story, remember that. I’d hate for you to have an accidentally crappy year. You don’t deserve a crappy year. You deserve a year filled with as much good stuff and as many valuable lessons as 365 days can fit in. To that end, I don't recommend having a Year of Debauchery.

At the party, there was a survey to fill out. Buster is making a friendbook. This is like a yearbook but made of friends instead. See, he really does go all out. Even on a Sunday. I thought I would share some of it with you. And that you would fill it out. Everyone likes surveys. It’s a chance to get to know yourself better. It’s a chance to feel like you are getting interviewed for a magazine.

Here are my favorite questions (and answers):

What’s your favorite food? (doughnuts)
What’s your spirit animal? (crow)
Would you rather bet everything on red or black? (red)
Squid are: beautiful, tasty or weird. (beautiful)
When is the last time you cried? (today)
Do you believe that black swans exist? (yes)
What are you striving for? (happiness)
Likely or unlikely that you’ll get what you’re striving for? (likely!)
Are you a good example of the kind of person you think people should be? (sometimes)
What’s something awesome? (resilience)
What’s something beautiful? (dewy grass)
You are beautiful and awesome. (So are you.)

That last one isn’t really a question. It’s a statement. It’s a statement that I liked reading. Just like when someone with a Sharpie writes “you are beautiful” across the bottom of the mirror in the ladies' room. The management probably isn’t very happy about having a written on mirror, but I love reading it anyway. I am beautiful. And so is the next girl who washes her hands. Beautiful. Look at us all. So different. So wounded. So healed. So optimistic. So cautious. So wonderful.

And you.

You are beautiful and awesome, too.

12 comments:

Jason said...

What’s your favorite food? Mom’s pesto
What’s your spirit animal? Bear
Would you rather bet everything on red or black? Black
Squid are: beautiful, tasty or weird. Weird
When is the last time you cried? Today
Do you believe that black swans exist? I have seen one.
What are you striving for? Leanness
Likely or unlikely that you’ll get what you’re striving for? Unlikely.
Are you a good example of the kind of person you think people should be? Fuck no.
What’s something awesome? My oldest son’s lips
What’s something beautiful? Winter sky
You are beautiful and awesome. I don’t think so.

Rusty said...

This Buster sounds like quite the character. Carpe Diem and all that good stuff.

heatherfeather said...

buster and i have the same birthday.

What’s your favorite food? lemon cake
What’s your spirit animal? puppy
Would you rather bet everything on red or black? red
Squid are: beautiful, tasty or weird. weird
When is the last time you cried? sunday morning
Do you believe that black swans exist? yes
What are you striving for? quiet
Likely or unlikely that you’ll get what you’re striving for? likely
Are you a good example of the kind of person you think people should be? sometimes
What’s something awesome? sunrise
What’s something beautiful? cold, crisp, late autumn wind
You are beautiful and awesome. if i am, it's because of the squishy gifts we all have and give in perfect economy.

Unknown said...

Jason: Oh. But you are beautiful and awesome.

Rusty: Indeed he is.

Heather: I like that your spirit is the perpetual youth of a dog.

Anonymous said...

What’s your favorite food? (fennel gratin)
What’s your spirit animal? (crane)
Would you rather bet everything on red or black? (red, lucky!)
Squid are: beautiful, tasty or weird. (tasty)
When is the last time you cried? (yesterday)
Do you believe that black swans exist? (yes)
What are you striving for? (self-awareness)
Likely or unlikely that you’ll get what you’re striving for? (likely)
Are you a good example of the kind of person you think people should be? (yes)
What’s something awesome? (generosity)
What’s something beautiful? (misty mountains)
You are beautiful and awesome. (Thank you.)

Great post Heather.

Unknown said...

C: I had no idea you liked fennel gratin. NO IDEA AT ALL. And I thought we were friends.

Anonymous said...

Well I considered listing my fav food as "Champagne". I'm sure that wouldn't have surprised you. :)

Anonymous said...

Thank you.

Heather said...

Fave food: eggs
spirit animal: lynx
red or black: red
squid: all of the above
cried: today
black swans: for sure
striving for: creation
likely or unlikely: more likely the more I let go of my fear that it's really unlikely
kind of person people should be: mostly, since my secondary striving is loving kindness
something awesome: how full of meaning the world is
something beautiful: a well-poured latte. i mean this in a very deep way, really. I'll explain it some time.
beautiful and awesome: you are so right about me. you are so right about you.

When is your birthday?

Unknown said...

H: March 18. You?

and

I love this: Likely or unlikely: more likely the more I let go of my fear that it's really unlikely

Heather said...

November 3. can I wear a sparkly dress too?

I guess it's good that we're not the same sign. I guess that would just be too much. Right?

Unknown said...

Yes. It works best if the Heathers are spaced out.